Mind of Mencia, hosted by the comedian Carlos Mencia.

I was surfing around looking at comedies and jokes when I came across this show.  It’s a really funny American comedy show on Comedy Central.  He makes fun of all kinds of things, from politics to rappers to different cultures.  

Below is the link to one of my favorites.  It's called, "Why are you afraid of a black president?

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=97269&title=president-obama

Here's another one my favorites.  It's about rappers rapping about jail.

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=85221&title=bow-down

Here’s the link to the Comedy Central website.  Check out his other videos, they’re really funny!

http://www.comedycentral.com/funny_videos/index.jhtml?showId=15463&searchSort=AirDate&start=1

  Quote

中国的2008年

2008年，中国发生了这么多事。从雪灾到今天……

正当大家兴奋地倒数，迎接奥运，超过一万个兄弟姐妹们离开了。

就这样离开了。

来源：明报新闻网

 

 

温爷爷说：“只要有一线希望，我们就尽百倍努力，绝不会放弃！”

好感动……

 

这让我想起一句话：Blessing in disguise。

 

最近的这么多事，教我们中国人要团结，要爱国。

我们学会了。

 

经过这一些……大家的思想都会改变。

 

其实，我也变了。变得更爱国，使我更骄傲地说：“我是中国人。”

 

在2008年8月8日（080808），我们会为祖国掉下热泪。

因为我们一起经历过了……

 

我相信中国绝对有能力调整脚步，继续前进，前进，前进，进！

 

我的中国心！

 

中国人！要团结！要坚强！

Human = eat + sleep + w­ork + enjoy

Donkey = eat + sleep

Therefore,

Human = Donkey + work + enjoy

If, Human - enjoy = Donkey + work­

In other
words,

Human that don't know enjoy =Donkey that work  

*********************************************

Men = eat + sleep + earn money

Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,

Men = Donkeys + earn money

If Men - earn money = Donkeys

In other words,

Men that don't earn
money = Donkeys   

********************************************

Women = eat + sleep + spend

Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,

Women = Donkeys + spend

If, Women - spend = Donkeys

In other
words,

Women that don't spend = Donkeys  

*******************************************

To
Conclude:

* Men earn money not to let women become Donkeys!

*
Women spend not to let men become Donkeys!

* Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys!          

**
And the Donkeys lived happily ever after!

I don't know much about Tai Chi, but I read this funny article about the new ways of modern Tai Chi.  These moves are very creative!  Here are a few of my favorite moves.  Which ones do you know?

2)      Lotus Divorce Position with Antioxidants – Arrange hands in claw position and lean to the right to avoid flying dish.  Cover ears of child like holding small eggplant as former spouse shouts hurtful words.  In a spinning move to the right, plant foot in position to trip bitter mother-in-law.  Press hands forward selfishly, as if “shoving evil lawyer,” then raise hands in mock surrender. 

3)      Money Stance of Happy Rooster – Place right hand on right ear as if listening to well-connected friend provide stock information over cellular communication device.  Begin hopping up and down like a happy rooster.  Place left hand on left ear and “share joyful news with secret butterfly lover.”  Pirouette a bit.  Squat to regain balance.  Rise like sun and place arms at side as if getting fitted for a suit.  Step forward and grasp neck of Chivas bottle.  Repeat movement until market correction.

4)      Carry Lapdog Like Precious Lantern – Extend both arms forward and lock hands.  Pull hands toward stomach and cradle fluffy white dog of happiness.  Unlock hands and release dog.  Relax shoulders and watch dog interact with surroundings.  Scream at dog like angry mountain.  Laugh at dog like wise dragon.  Talk to dog like elder sister.  With elbow swords repel dogcatcher, jabbing finger in eye of non-dog person.  Bend torso at 45 degree angle and move hands in mock gesture of scooping up dog poop.

5)      Low Kick of Nouveau Riche – With swirling arms, create luxury logos in the air.  Repose on Louis XIV sofa whilst staring at wall mural of gladiators and lake nymphs.  Stand, bend forward and turn key of shiny black German sedan.  Close eyes and drive.  Fly on dragon’s wing to Europe, delivering low kicks to seat of passenger in front.  Balancing on one ear, attend art opening.  Shove hor d’oeuvres in pockets.  Cradle image of self as epicure whilst reaching for 10^th glass of burgundy.  Renew lucrative contract.  Swirl arms and relax.

6)      Flying Hand of Apartment Buyer – Execute spinning kick of middle-class aspirant.  Thrust huge deposit in agent’s hands before signing contract.  With palms up, prepare to receive deposit back after owner ups price.  Raise right hand to forehand, as if searching horizon for real estate deal. Now execute flying hands.  Place fingers in ear, as if at construction site in Songjiang.  Inspect unfinished 150sqm apartment.  Embrace mortgage banker.  Skip to Ikea.  Relax – you’ve made it.

7)      Wash the Air with Sweeping Arm – Wave hands as dragon-bus emitting exhaust fumes passes.  Bend elbow, place arm over nose and mouth to discourage dust particles from taking up residence in lung.  Hold nose in underwater posture while passing building site.  Leap out of way of blue barrels of unholy contents.  Stand still for chest X-ray.  Light another cigarette.  Shrug shoulders and bow to progress.  Repeat movement daily to strengthen immune system.

I just added two more ESL PowerPoint Presentations titled Gestures and Crime & Punishment.

The first one, “Gestures,” talks about different gestures around the world.  People use gestures every day from the way we stand and sit to various hand signals.  When communicating and dealing with foreigners, it is important that we learn their gestures so that we don’t offend them.  This ESL PowerPoint Presentation includes gestures as the finger, V-sign, thumbs-up, A-OK, the dog call, etc.  It has detailed information regarding American gestures as well as gestures from Japan, China, Korea and Taiwan.  Also included are: Things that tick Americans off, how others view Americans, dealing with Americans, doing business with Americans and much more.  Below is a picture of some simple gestures and their meaning in different parts of the world. 

Here’s a short excerpt from the PowerPoint: Good Rules to Follow regarding gestures.

►       

►      RESPECT: This mean the capability of demonstrating respect in whichever way a specific culture requires: respect for age, respect in manner of speech, respect with eye contact, respect with hand or body gestures, respect for personal privacy, and so on.

►      TOLERATING AMBIGUITY (Doubtfulness or uncertainty): This refers to the skill of reacting positively to new, different, and at times, unpredictable situations.

►      RELATING TO PEOPLE: This means placing the management of people on an equal level with "getting the job done." Too often, American managers are totally result-oriented without sensitivity to the " people ingredient."

►      BEING NON JUDGEMENTAL: This is the ability to withhold judgment until all information is accumulated, while also taking into account cultural idiosyncrasies that could color judgment.

►      PERSONALIZING ONE'S OBSERVATION: This is the skill of recognizing that each person sees the world from his or her own platform of observations.

►      EMPATHY: This skill, the ability to place yourself in another person's shoes, is on of the higher level skills in intercultural relationships.

►      PERSISTENCE: This is the companion word to "patience." Both are firm requirements in dealing with people from other societies around the world.

Click on the link below to download and learn about Gestures

http://cid-da3e08396ceedb11.skydrive.live.com/self.aspx/English%20PPTs/Gestures.ppt

The second ESL PowerPoint Presentation is titled “Crime & Punishment.”  The first half looks at mug shots of various celebrities and lists their crime and punishment.  The presentation then covers some basic crime and punishment vocabulary, such as arrest, assault, suspect, parole, convict, release, etc.  In addition, I’ve also included some surprising U.S. crime statistics.  For example, every 32 minutes, a murder takes place, every 1 minute, a robbery happens, etc.  The lesson then asks the classroom some questions regarding their opinion on various crimes.  For example, “Should polygraphs be used in crime investigations?”  Other items included are California’s 3 strikes law and prisons. 

Click on the link below to  download “Crime & Punishment” 

http://cid-da3e08396ceedb11.skydrive.live.com/self.aspx/English%20PPTs/Crime%20and%20Punishment.ppt 

Check out both of these ESL PowerPoint Lessons and increase your knowledge and vocabulary.  These lessons are not just for ESL teachers, but for anyone who wants to learn English.  

You can also download these files on the main page Quick Links section.  http://fgoningbo999.spaces.live.com/